Don’t you like it when bloggers like me say, “I’m sorry. I just haven’t had time to post.”
Absolutely no one in the world cares when an every day blogger hasn’t blogged. Those are just the cold hard facts.
But, I’M BACK!!!! Never you fear, my friend. I’ll be blogging from the grave.
Speaking of fear. Ebola. Can I just say that me and my fellow hypochondriacs don’t need this? I can turn a scratch on my arm into stage 4 Brain Cancer. What am I going to do with bleeding eyeballs?
Don’t think I haven’t been making plans. I told my family they were no longer allowed to talk to people in person. They’ll be home schooled now, and I think we’ll be just fine with all the canning I did this summer. Plus, Scott has all that smoked meat out back in the shed. We should be good for quite some time.
Not true. We’re totally screwed. We don’t garden, hunt, sew or home school. We’re so squarely on the grid, we might own it.
I meant to get off the dang grid. Why do I have to be so forgetful?
I HAVE been talking to my family about improving their immune systems. I heard that can help. But, I’m always preaching that. That’s not really new.
My family is excited, because all this Ebola hype means that we’re going to have even less fun stuff to eat in our house. And, they won’t get away with forgetting their vitamins. That’s how you fight Ebola, with a vitamin. I’m surprised the CDC didn’t think of that.
I was talking to my kids about Ebola at the dinner table. I thought I was calm, and appeared unafraid. I guess not. Olivia’s hands started to shake. She told me to just stop talking about it. Yeah. That’s not funny. I promise, I stopped. She’s a younger version of the big Fraidy Cat she calls, Mom. So, I have to be careful with her.
Zeke told Olivia to stop being afraid. He said, “So what if we get Ebola? Then we get to go to heaven.”
Sometimes you just need kids to tell you it’ll be alright.
I admit it. I’m prone to hysteria. I hate that about me.
It’s just that lately I totally get it. I get that the world is scary, and evil is real. When I was reading the Ebola coverage, I clicked on a video about South American prisoners throwing prison guards from the prison roof. I thought it was going to be a story to read. It wasn’t. It was a video. Before I could process what I was watching, I saw these prisoners with Klu Klux Klan type white hoods on, literally pushing men off the roof. One prisoner dangled a guard with a rope tied around the guard’s ankles. I can’t believe I saw that. I didn’t finish watching it. Usually I avoid terrifying images. Now those images are caught in my head.
Maybe I imagined it? I’m not entirely positive, but don’t look it up. I’m serious. Don’t.
I didn’t actually sleep much the night I saw those images. I slept for a while, but then I started dreaming about those prisoners. I woke in a state of terror. Then, I started thinking about Ebola. Then, I wondered who’s dumb idea it was to never have any liquor in the house. I was pretty edgy.
I started praying.
I begged, “God, just stomp it out. Stomp out the evil. You know you can. Why don’t you?”
Then, God answered with a large roar from the heavens. Oh, wait. That was Scott snoring.
I didn’t hear anything audible. But, I thought something. I don’t think it was my own thought. I think it was a thought God was nice enough to give me. I think He reminded me of how simple things are. He reminded me that the ability I think I have to control things is an illusion. At any moment, I am one plague away from a completely different life. I always forget that.
He reminded me that this comfortable illusion keeps me insulated from the truth. The truth that evil is real. Evil is real whether or not I believe God is real too. But, here’s the part that’s awesome. I do believe God is real; I believe He wins.
I thanked God for the path He’s given me, given my whole family. I thanked him for the comfort I feel from Him. I thanked Him for staying up late with me and listening to my heart. I thanked him for giving me comfort when I’m scared of plagues and prisoners. I thanked him for a battle that He’s already won.
I can’t remember what else I thanked him for, because that’s when I fell back to sleep. And, that’s why I’m glad we believe God is real. Because I can’t imagine a world with Ebola and scary prisoners without God.